We are a mess

Feeling very fragmented and very lost and very confused... we've eaten everything today, every last bite, every fat, every starch, every protein, every freaking milk, every fruit, every vegetable. Everything I've eaten today is piled up to my mouth in my stomach. I can't lean over. I can hardly move. I'm just laying on my bed, miserable.
This is the wonderful land of recovery???? Because if this is recovery, it's BS. It sucks! I don't want anything to do with it!!!

We are seriously doing everything we can to keep it together. Drinking ginger tea, sucking on ginger mints, laying down, resting, not purging... and it feels SO incredibly wrong.

This will pass. I am making the right decision. I am strong enough to get through this feeling of fullness and uncomfortableness. It is temporary.