Anxious/excited

I am anxious and excited all at once for my birthday! On one hand I'm super happy that I get to celebrate with my family. On the other hand I have a history of getting depressed on my birthday and don't want that to happen. I think I will be ok. But I am worried.

But this year is different from last year.  I have a lot of support, I have my treatment team and my family and I think I'm going to be ok. Last year I had my suicide attempt shortly after my birthday. That won't happen this year. I am stronger and I am safe. I will not sink like I did last year. I am strong.

Today I am going to play with kitties and then have lunch with my dietician. And then tonight is a spaghetti dinner with everyone and gift exchange. Not looking forward to spaghetti but I'll make it through. 

Have a good Friday! TGIF!