Feeling good about being healthy

I just had a meeting with my dietician, and it was a good meeting. Yes there were tears, but it ended well! I was weighed, and my dietician informed me that she can now lower my meal plan and increase my activity. I was excited and devastated all at once. Does lowering my meal plan mean my weight has skyrocketed?? Am I too heavy?? My dietician assured me that is NOT the case. That it's time for me to have my meal plan lowered to catch up with my recovery. This makes sense… and I haven;t been meeting my whole meal plan anyway. This won't make much of a difference, but it IS a decrease, which is good. My dietician won't let me get too heavy and that is good.

Then we ate ice cream. Which tasted awesome! Mud pie (coffee ice cream with cookie crumbles). So delicious. I didn't even measure it and I was able to enjoy the treat! It tasted really good and I focused on that, not the calories, not that it's "bad." It's food that tastes yummy and that's ok! Healthy people are allowed to eat ice cream too. I am allowed to eat food that tastes good.

Then at the end of our meeting I made a decision. I asked my dietician if I could stop measuring my food. For the past several years I have used measuring cups and spoons with ALL of my food… rice, pasta, milk, peanut butter, cereal… you name it I measure it. Pretty obsessive right? But it's what I'm used to. So I made a decision. For this week I am NOT going to measure my food. I can eyeball how much I need. I can eat without measuring. SUPER nervous and scared but ready. I want to be a normal eater. I'm sick of measuring all my food. It's time.

AND. And I'm going to stop counting calories once and for all… not measuring my food will help me because I will not be able to exactly count all the calories. This is a huge step. I can do this. Progress!!!!

I feel good about the progress I've made. I can be PROUD that I am healthy. I am a fighter!! YOU Can do this too!! Take a leap of faith. Healthy is GOOD.