Today is the day

Today is the day. The day where I am finally going to be successful. It doesn't matter how urgy or how uncomfortable I am, I will fight through. It's the first few days that are the hardest t get through and then it DOES get easier. It's just these first few days of hell. But I know I can make it through these few days.

Because really, what's the point of having eating disorder behaviors? Where does it get me? It gets me nowhere except in trouble and in the hospital. And I do NOT want to end up there. Yesterday at the doctor I was already orthostatic. My blood pressure is showing I am dehydrated as a result of my behaviors. Now it's not too serious yet but If I continue on this path I will get sicker. I can't afford to be sick! I have school and volunteering and so many good things I'm looking forward to! I want to drive and be independent. I have to PROVE I can do these things. And that means eating and retaining the nutrition.

So today is the day. Breakfast was toast with peanut butter and strawberries. Nutritious and healthy and tasty! I deserve to keep down this meal: my. Key needs it! I have an early group to distract and then therapy and then grocery shopping. So I'm distracted all morning which is good. Today is the day. I can do this.