Giving up control

I am giving up control. It's time. I am no longer going to lie or cheat or manipulate. Usually on weigh days I eat very little and drink nothing to weigh as little as possible. I'm done with this nonsense. Tomorrow morning I will drink my coffee because I enjoy it and it wakes me up, and I will have my breakfast at school. I will eat a full lunch, not a half-assed sandwich, and I will get weighed, and I will survive. So what if my weight is up a pound or two in water weight? Who cares?? I don't want to care anymore. I want to live. And I don't want to put my life on hold on Mondays and Fridays when I get weighed. It just isn't that important. And it isn't the end of the world. I think this will take a lot of stress out of my week.

I called the therapist on call to get some advise, as today has been hard. I will eat dinner and continue on with my day. I deserve to eat and be nourished. I deserve to be happy and feel ok after eating, and I deserve to keep the food down. I am strong.

Sorry for all the posts today... I'm just trying to write myself out of some poor decisious. Thanks for reading and hopefully my insight can help you. All I want to do is help.

Believe in yourself.