I haven't been a student for two years... so I'm out of practice. Reading, studying, taking tests all seems foreign to me. Tonight I took two quizzes... I did ok. Not as well as I'd like to have done. I mean I more than passed... my scores are not terrible. They just aren't the A+s that I'm used to. I'm used to acing my classes, being really on top of grades. And I find that I'm struggling.
I have to be patient with myself. I need to recognize that it HAS been two years since I've been in school. I am really good when it comes to papers and projects, and that will certainly raise my scores. I should not be so worried. I am going to pass my classes. I am going to do well. Right now I just want to rip my hair out.
Today has been stressful overall. I had an early morning group, and then session with my therapist, and then grocery shopping (which was actually really fun) and then groups all afternoon... dinner, and 1:1 staff with a young woman who really makes me mad. She's just condescending and treats me like I'm dumb. She was pushing me to follow my "structures" around eating, which I haven't done in months. AHH I'm just really frustrated. I feel like I'm treated like a baby... but at the same time I have so much to do and so many responsibilities. I'm not complaining. Or am I? I'm not complaining.
I am going to bed early tonight. After snack I am calling it a night.
Sending love.
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