Ugly

I am ugly.

I don't know why I feel this way.

I don't understand why it makes me so sad.

But I am ugly.

I guess I just have to learn to deal with it. Learn to embrace my ugliness. It radiates off me. I am an ugly person inside and out.

None of my clothes fit.

Nothing looks right.

I want to disappear into nothing again. I want to be invisible. I want to be unnoticed. I want to be a ghost, a shadow of myself.

But I am stronger than this. I can learn to accept. I can learn to live, to thrive. I can see past the ugliness and try to see the good. I do good things. I have good parts of myself. I'm not all bad... No person is all bad.. My kids aren't bad, my cats aren't bad, they aren't ugly and fat and worthless. I am not worthless.

You are not worthless.

You are worth it.

You can fight through.

You deserve to live. 

You deserve to feel beautiful.

You are beautiful.

waiting for the internal storm to pass