Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Cause for concern?

I'm a bit concerned about my feelings of needing to exercise in order to allow myself to eat. Today I pushed my 30 minute walk into more of 40 minute, intense walk. I will admit I was thinking about burning calories. And it was hot so I felt I was sweating out energy as well.

This is not healthy, and I am feeling kind if confused... Does exercise genuinely make me happy and feel good? Or am I happy because I am giving into negative thoughts and artificially feeling better? I don't know the answer to this question, and it's frustrating. I want to believe they exercise does genuinely make me feel good and get the endorphins flowing. But if it's turning into an unhealthy behavior I need to look at it more closely. I will certainly talk to my dietician about it when I see her tomorrow; I just do not want to have walking taken away. I like getting out in the fresh air and I am not slaving away at the gym watching the calories burned every second.

Today I cheated a bit with my snack as well... I wanted a frappucino, and I got one, but I got a "light" drink instead f a real one. I ordered the diet choice on a whim thinking I could cut some calories and it tasted really good, but I should have gotten the real drink instead of the diet one. I will have to make up some calories later. No cutting corners allowed.

Dinner is chicken stirfry with brown rice, and it's with frozen vegetables which are ok I guess but not as good as fresh. Hopefully with a lot of soy sauce it will taste good!

I'm thinking of starting to post some of my story on my blog... Somewhere to write about my life, share my story, explain how I got here. 
What do you think?

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