Slipping into old behaviors..

There are definite warning signs that I am slipping into old behaviors. And it's making me pretty nervous. I need to be honest, I have told the staff at my house some of what's going on, but while I'm writing here I may as well be honest.

I have an application on my phone, My Fitness Pal, that tracks calories and exercise, and I have found myself each day aiming for lower and lower calories and obsessively tracking every bite I eat. Healthy? NO not at all. I need to be eating my meal plan and listening to my body, not relying on numbers to rule my day. Also, my daily walks have turned into a way to "burn off" what I've eaten. Mehh. I need to stop. It needs to stop! I have to erase this miserable app. But I'm scared.

Tonight at dinner we had pizza, and I took the smallest piece and a small salad, and (shocker) I was still really hungry! My body was BEGGING me to have another piece of pizza but it wasn't ok. I couldn't do it. I made a big cup of mint tea, and then went for a walk. It's better than purging, but not the best choice at this time. If I want to continue on the road to independence, I need to be moving forward with my health, not going backwards. And I am ok with my body, so i don't know what is fueling this mini lapse.

Steps to move forward:
1. Eat snack tonight. All of snack, and add something if I can. I have not had enough calories today.
2. Wake up in the morning and eat my full breakfast
3. Continue to eat and keep everything down.

Sounds simple, right? Right.
I wish it was simple.

But I REFUSE to give up now! This is a minor blip, I am on the right track.
Moving forward.