Getting weighed

I'm so silly sometimes... Freaking out about getting weighed AFTER breakfast and snack and lunch. I feel the food will make my weight skyrocket. It really is silly. I generally restrict before weighing, so this is a good step I guess? I don't know. Feel so silly.

Little things that an eating disorder will do to you... It's crazy. My thoughts feel so irrational sometimes, like they aren't really my thoughts, like I've been invaded by an  alien or something. I'm not so shallow and insecure that I don't want to be weighed after a plate of pasta... Really? Sometimes I just have to laugh at myself. My thoughts do not make much sense. Nobody is here to judge me based on my weight. 

I'm going to curl up and hide for a little while. Will write more later :)