Talk with someone who is recovered

Today I had a doctor appointment and I had a nice young lady who works at the program I'm at drive me. She is recovered from an eating disorder. We talked today and she told me some of her story... She developed bulimia when she was 19 and struggled for 10 years... Had a heart attack but never was in treatment or therapy. She recovered on her own two years ago.

I am amazed. She just decided to get better on her own, knew she wouldn't live much longer the way she was going.... So she chose to be healthy.

It's so inspirational to talk to people who have recovered from an eating disorder. When I'm in the grips of my disorder I feel like I'll never get better... But then I hear stories of ladies who were in as bad of a space as I've been and they are healthy now!! It seems like an impossible feat. But it's not. It's totally possible to be recovered.

There is debate as to whether one can completely recover from an eating disorder. One view is that an eating disorder is an addiction and like drugs, you can be in recovery, but that's for the rest of your life. There will always be the thoughts it's just choosing not to have behaviors. On the other hand, people believe you can fully recover from an eating disorder and not have the thoughts anymore. I don't know what I believe... I feel like I'll always have these unhealthy thoughts about food... But I know people and of people who truly don't have the thoughts and symptoms anymore. If I can recover and truly be free I choose that!!! I want nothing more than to be healthy and free of the eating disorder, I'm just doubtful that all the thoughts truly go away... People will certainly disagree with me, and believe me I really hope complete recovery is possible!!

Anyway; I was feeling really down and lousy this morning and now I feel very motivated. I want so badly to be healthy and with the exception of a few slips these past weeks, I am on my way. Following my meal plan, drinking enough water, exercising as I'm allowed, and talking about slip ups. I'm doing everything to move in the right direction. It doesn't always feel right but it is the right thing I think. I'm ready for a better life.