No more cutting corners

So I went through my meal plans that I had created for the week (I had skimped on several exchanges) and added them back in. Yes the calories will be higher, yes I am afraid it will make me gain weight. But most likely my body will be grateful for the food it's getting and respond well. And if I am actually satieted and not hungry, I won't crave pints of ice cream and end up binging and purging. I so DO NOT want to end up in the binge/purge cycle again. Eating well, healthily and balanced, will prevent this.

It's hard not to cut corners. The staff at the house where I live are not eating disorder savvy. They don't know when I'm skipping the butter on my vegetables, or the dressing on my salad, or that I'm having 1/2 cup soy milk vs a whole cup. It's up to me to make the right choices for my body. MY CHOICE. If I want to get away with shenanigans I can. But I don't want to be sick and a cheater and a liar anymore. It makes me feel so guilty. There is definitely a rush from restricting but it is NOT worth it in the end.

So follow your meal plan, and most importantly BE HONEST about what you are and aren't eating. I find that if I just totally come clean to my treatment team I feel so much better and it encourages me to do the right thing.

Food is good! Get it all in! And someday maybe I will enjoy it again. I can't wait for that day.